Tonight, a sad plan .

I didn't get it. I couldn't get it. I didn't want to face a reality that I was betting on, I was secretly always hoping against it. I just wouldn't. I look down and I face back up. The burn burn burning of incenses, that change, in the room's smell. To take it off me, the smell, I couldn't think straight anymore, the smell so strong encouraged within a reaction to sneeze, though I wouldn't. I knew nothing this evening was going to be easy, a desire to sneeze was going to be an obvious one. I swear if anything else goes wrong this evening I'm just going to cry, when no one is looking, I mean I know girls get this way, all of my girlfriends one way or another have mentioned how nothing has resorted them to tears, and they always feel the better for it too. Like the odometer rolling over... I wouldn't know, I'm too irresponsible to get my act together to be able to drive. I'm ok with that, it is the rest of the world that finds that a problem. I'll do it one day, I will take up all the offers my friends give me. They can all do that now, my savings could cover any damage right. I mean if I owned a car, I wouldn't want retards driving it. Get all the insurance pushed up and all the rest. But tonight I will just stay in, no further thoughts of leaving via a car as I will just try and read something found, and I will watch a repeat film for children, as I let the sneeze in my nose force my eyes closed. Hopefully dreaming of my companion with a better smell.